We thought it would be nice to put together a few etiquette tips for you on things that you should or shouldn’t do or maybe should just have as a heads up.
Bridal shower and wedding guests:
Rules dictate that if you invite someone to the bridal shower you should invited them to the wedding as well. There are of course exceptions to the rules, for example if people at work throw you a shower you don’t need to feel obligated to invite them to the wedding. If you invite say your third cousin twice removed to your actual bridal shower it is a common courtesy to invite them to your wedding, if you don’t it could be considered rude and possibly cause hard feelings.
Cash bar only:
This is considered a big no no in the wedding industry! We under stand that you have probably already spent a small fortune so far, however look at it from a guests point of view. You possibly have bought a plane ticket to get there, bought new outfits and a great gift from the registry and then you find out you have to pay for drinks. It could put a sour taste in the guests mouth. Maybe other options could be looked at, for instance, paying for the cocktail hour or a two hour free drink limit or maybe just not serving alcohol.
Thank you notes:
Yes these are a MUST! They don't have to match your invitation suite unless you want them to. For the shower/bachelorette events you should get them mailed out no later than a month after the event. For gifts given at the wedding you have a little more flexibility but try not to make it more than 2-3 months afterwards out of politeness.
Save the dates:
Although not all couples send these out and they are not required, it is helpful for some guests. Especially those that live out of town. They may need to set up travel arrangements and hotel accommodations. These can be sent out as far as a year away but if you intend to send them closer keep the out of towners in mind so they have an opportunity to prepare.
Asking for money as a gift:
This is and always will be considered a HUGE faux pas!! You should never out right say it or add it to your invitations, that is considered really rude. Money is a non-spoken gift that allot of people already give because its the easiest choice.
Who pays for what breakdown:
Here is the basic traditional break down. We understand that in this day and age nothing is set in stone so take it as a basic guideline not a set rule of thumb!
- Wedding gown and all accessories
- Bouquets/Reception Flowers/Corsages
- Ceremony/Reception and accoutrements
- Invitation Suite/Save the dates
- DJ/Ceremony Pianist
- Wedding Cake
- Favors/Throwing Rice
- Bridal Shower (with help from the bridesmaids)
- Rehearsal Dinner
- Grooms Cake
- Bridesmaids gifts
- Bridesmaid Luncheon
- Groomsmen gifts
- Engagement ring (obviously)
- His tuxedo
Bride and Groom together
- Wedding rings
- Clergy fee
- Church fee
- Marriage License
- Bachelor Bachelorette Parties
We hope these tips on etiquette have been helpful. As we said nothing is set in stone so don’t feel you have to stick to some guideline you know your financials better than anyone.